Tell me.. am I only going to push you away when I’m honest about my feelings? Would we become closer if you saw what’s in my heart? Am I like Icarus, destined to burn up when reaching for the sun? There is so much I want to say and do. But out of fear of losing you, I can’t share my true hopes, pains, concerns and more. I feel shackled. Confined. Like part of me is being...
I don’t want anything to change.. But I want everything to change.. Truth is, I wish I meant what he does to you. I wish anyone felt that way about me. I wish I didn’t feel so damn alone, even when I’m with you. Because I know I’ll never “be with you”. And I know I’ll regret even posting this, but fuck it. Fuck it all. I’ve got feelings and thoughts...
Ate dinner even though I didn’t feel like it really. Just stuffed it down as much as it would let me. Not sure if I should be spamming someone or not. Should be working on college project; big surprise that I’m not looking forward to it or even in the mood for it. -.-
I will never be that.
Rambling to myself. Ignorek.
So maybe I should do what I said at first.. I mean really, this has to stop doesn’t it? Or can I just keep going like this and just forget about these nights or pretend they never happened? Too many questions that just don’t have a real answer I guess. Just know that tonight .. was not a good night. Or won’t be. Argh. I’m not even speaking in my own timezone anymore. :s...
I wish I was the type people fell for.